Earlier today I responded to a post of Brad Drell's on the Hob/d listserv. While I intended that post to go directly to Brad, instead I accidentally sent it to the entire listserv. In it, I basically thanked him for his direct response to posts regarding San Joaquin and mentioned my dismay at much of the angry discourse on the listserv.
I'll admit I usually love the Episcopal Church and its structured liturgy and polity. I love the unity and tolerance of different ideas and of each other that I found when I came to the Episcopal Church as well as the idea that we could "agree to disagree." I loved that we could all read the gospel and follow it to where we believe God is leading us without believing that those who believed it took them somewhere else were heretical.
But I'm not seeing that anymore.
There is name calling, self-confidence, and scorn. I see that people are hurt and I can feel much of that hurt. It is sad and painful that so many people have been forced to bear the weight of closemindedness as ignorance, but that is no reason for pride at the expense of others who truly believe that what we call progress is in fact a regression.
Similarly, there should be no source of pride at schism in God's church, and indeed, on the Hobd listserv we often forget that. Lost in canon and tradition is that, in the end, God wants his whole church to be his.
When I ran as an alternate for convention deputy I wanted to make a difference: I wanted to help people and be part of a body that helps to glorify God. That exists to the glory of God.
After Minneapolis I felt like I had found that body. After Columbus I found I have to separate my faith from my religion.
I am so sick of all this fighting. I'm sick of people being hurt and ostracized in the name of God. And I think that's what bugs me most of all: it doesn't seem like it is to the glory of God, it seems like this arguing is for tradition and to make sure we are following canon law. Yes, the canons and tradition are important, I'm Jewish, I know that.
I don't want to see litigation. I understand why it must be done, but I also feel that it is being done as ferociously as possible. I don't envy +KJS. Nothing she can do is "right" and and she is fairing quite well. If people feel they must leave, then leave. If people honestly feel they cannot act and worship to the glory of God in TEC then leave, but please don't drag us down with you.
I love the Anglican Communion, The Episcopal Church, the people, its liturgy, its respect for law, and its polity. But please, don't forget that first and foremost, we are working to do God's will and worship and praise God. Isn't that what the church is for?